I miss the way things used to be. Safe, fuzzy,and warm like a sweater. All-encompassing, but at the same time you could roll your sleeves up and get your hands dirty at any time. And in the midst of it, I find myself utterly, and almost completely uncaring. I'm making myself oblivious because other fires need to be tended. Except, in a few months my perspective will change. It's not the magic pill, but the last resort. The last thing I can do that will keep myself sane, and just thinking about it keeps me sane. Because the way that I'm going right now can't last forever. It's not lasting now, and it needs to change. Maybe then, everything else will sort out...I'm not that old am I?

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then / after